Revd.
Ian Field
This is a training I did with
Christian inmates at a Prison, over 3 short evening sessions
in summer 1996, it was a fairly small group who I had led
in Bible study some 18 months previous. Hopefully the value
of this (edited) transcript is the Biblical 'spin' on familiar
and basic techniques. It is important to keep in mind that
these prisoners had no prior exposure to NLP.
Session 1 "Time to
change"
We are here tonight
and for the next three weeks to look at a subject that I have
never heard taught on in a Christian context, but which is
at the heart of humanity and of Gods dealings with humanity.
One thing that is universal in our human experience, whether
Christian or not, is that we want to change something, it
would be easy for us here to say that we want to change our
environment, and then we would be happy - but then, do any
of you know people on the outside who are unhappy, even if
they have all you ever wanted?
It is not the
conditions of our lives that we really need to change, although
obviously, when you can, they might help, but rather we need
to be able to change 2 things: firstly how we feel, and secondly
how we behave, or the things we do. Can any of you think of
something that you want to change? Ok lets back up, why do
you want to change that, .... so you will feel happy and in
control, excellent, can you now see what I am talking about?
I think that change
is one of the essentials that we grasp in our relationship
with God, you see, the Bible is a book full of changes; first
of all there is nothing and chaos, then God speaks and there
is creation & order - fairly major change huh? What about
the change that took place when Adam & Eve sinned, again
this was of cosmic proportions, you see now we are in a position
where God being perfect does not change (Malachi 3.6) and
we being sinful need to! The Bible is a book of changed lives,
can anyone give me their favorite examples? (David, from boy
to King, Moses, from murderer to leader & prophet, Saul
to Paul, Legion, from demoniac to sound mind, many egs of
healing, the change in the disciples, fishermen to men of
God)
OK that's great,
now we have started, you won't be able to look at your Bible
the same way, you can see that Gods will is very much to change
us - for the better!
Lets have
a look at some of the levels or dimensions of change.(At this
point there was a discussion about change on a societal level,
which we decided was not going to happen until the individuals
changed).
First, there is
the level of beliefs, now I want to break this into 2 kinds.
1) 'Theological' beliefs, which define what we believe about
God, man, sin etc. The most important of which is that a person
believes in Jesus as Lord and Savior (without this belief
& the consequence of having a living relationship with
God through Him, all other change is simply rearranging the
paintings in a burning house!). Or again one might say "I
believe God heals" this will very much determine this
ones behavior in that he will (if he is consistent) pray for
the sick, and if you didn't believe it, why waste your time
& God's asking Him to?
You see, beliefs
control what we will even consider possible, what we will
see and experience of the world - how many of you can look
back with hindsight and see that God was working in your life
before you were saved? Aha! But you didn't notice at the time
did you? Why is that? Because you had a belief that said '
there is no God' therefore you couldn't allow yourself to
see Him!
2) The other kind
of beliefs are 'life' beliefs, these are just beliefs that
you pick up that are more general. I worked with a girl who
had been anorexic for many years, and she believed that her
body was disgusting. She just 'knew' that when anything went
wrong it was her fault! How about that for having beliefs
that will cause you pain in life? We will come back to beliefs
and the controlling force they exert on our behavior later
in the session.
Of course in the
real world, theological and 'life' beliefs are intertwined,
what about Sarah for example (Gen. 18.1-15), she had a belief
in that she 'knew' that old ladies don't have babies, of course
they don't! Right? No, God gives her a new belief "is
anything too hard for the Lord?" which opens up a new
possibility, she and Abraham both need to apply action to
the new belief and hey presto! Isaac is born - what a laugh
it can be to have a new belief about Gods power now!
Part of what God
does with us in bringing us to maturity in Christ is replacing
our old 'life' beliefs with eternally true 'theological' beliefs
from his word, and suddenly a whole new world of possibility
opens up, but more of that later.
Another area we
can see change is in values, Paul write in Phil 3.7-8 that
his old values of being a top notch Jew and Pharisee, were
as dung and refuse, in the light of knowing Christ. Many of
us have had our values turned upside down, whether that be
in the realm of right and wrong, or in what we think is important
or not. When one of your friends is mad keen on stamp collecting
and you think that is no big deal what is that a difference
of? Yes, values. We can discover our values just by asking
about any particular area of life "what's important to
me about ....?" your answers to those questions, about
life, relationships, family, money, spirituality and so on
will give you a good idea of what kinds of things you would
enjoy and what kinds of things would bring you real pain.
(There was a brief
discussion about the relationship between beliefs and values,
and that as human beings we chunk things down to understand
and describe them, but that we are whole beings therefore
no division is too watertight but for learning purposes only)
Identity:
I suppose the obvious one is Saul to Paul, IDENTITY is the
set of beliefs you have about yourself, who you are, how you
define yourself, what would you read as a definition if you
looked up your name in the dictionary? What makes you different
from the fellow sitting next to you? These are all parts of
your identity. Interestingly, as a belief it can limit our
behaviors in both positive & negative ways. For example,
if you asked me to dress in a tutu and run down the high street
shouting 'the queen is a man' I would turn you down, because
"I'm not like that - that's not the kind of person I
am". This can be a very positive thing -- it prevents
me from unhelpful behaviors. But also because my identity
is as a Christian, I will do things that are even uncomfortable
for me to do, reaching out to people who are in desperate
need, dying or in pain, and also not doing things that the
Bible teaches as sinful. If you have an identity, as 'a loser'
will, that affect the way you approach life than if you perceive
yourself as ' a child of God'? Try this one on for size, a
Charlie Brown cartoon based on 'all the worlds a stage' Charlie
is talking to Linus and says "I stepped out onto the
stage of life, and a voice called out 'No he's wrong for the
part'"!
What about behavior?
We can change our behavior, Eph 4.22-24 to put off, be renewed
in the spirit of our minds, and then put on better behavior,
holy, righteous & consistent with our new identity as
Gods new creation. Notice that this isn't just remedial, in
terms of just stopping sinning, but more so in terms of growing
into Christlikeness and maturity in the Spirit.
Healing is a major
category that we will skim over, just note that in physical;
healing for example God gave Abraham's body which was as good
as dead, the bible says in Rom 4.16-22 the power or potential
to Father a child, his body changed. In a spiritual sense
you can see regeneration as healing of the fallen human spirit,
and the ministry of Jesus in freeing people like Legion from
evil spirits as covering the spiritual realm also. And of
course in Psalm 23 David writes about the fact that God restores
his soul (there was some discussion about the difference etc.
of spirit & soul, and the main point came out that Gods
work and salvation is for the whole person, see also 1 Thess
5.23)
God doesn't change,
we have to, He is the rock, He is perfect that means there
is no flaw in him to get worse, or to improve. Our experience
of Him changes because He is infinite, and we encounter new
facets of Him, this is part of the adventure that Heaven will
be. Change is a major issue in the Christian life.
The last level
of change I want to mention is that of changing our thinking
or changing our mind. The Bible has plenty to say about it
explicitly, but also was of course written so God could reveal
Himself to us, so we would change the way we think, that is
why the Bible is the most important reference we have in thinking
about change. All lasting change must bring us more closely
into line with Gods Word and with what He says about life,
behavior and what is important and what things mean, if we
don't we are deceiving ourselves and going down a blind alley.
Anyway, repentance
is changing your mind, lets look at some: Acts 3.19 what did
they need to repent from? They had crucified Christ, God had
raised him from the dead & made him Lord of all, and man
were they in trouble! They needed to change their thinking
about Jesus & turn to God, quite often this is an emotional
event as well, that is because we often need a bit of pain
to shift our old habitual thought patterns.
Rom 12.2 says,
"Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed
by the renewing of your mind so that you may know what is
that good and perfect and acceptable will of God". Lets
step back a little and see where we are now, The Christian
life is a change in direction first and foremost, turning
from sin to God, from independence to the Lordship of Christ,
changing from hellbound to heavenbound.
Decision plays
a major part in our walk with God. Without getting snarled
up in any predestination / freewill debate, let us listen
together to Gods manner of dealing with mankind: Deut 30.19.
God asks them to choose life, He sets two very distinct paths
before them, obedience, life, blessing or disobedience, death,
cursing, now this was to a certain group of people in a particular
historical context, but lets see a couple of principles. God
never changes, God sets the rules, our experience of God changes
according to the decisions we make about His rules, if we
break them we suffer pain, if we obey them we experience pleasure.
But the emphasis is on our ability to make decisions: in the
moments of decision our destiny is set, if that sounds a bit
of an overstatement, then think about salvation, your eternal
destiny was altered!
Also in this prison
context this is more poignant, you see, everything you think,
say or do is a cause set in motion. At some point will have
a result in either your internal experience or in the 'real'
world, these effects or results all stack up to take your
life in a certain direction, and for every direction there
is a destination. I heard Billy Graham put it another way,
he said "Sow a thought, reap an action, sow an action,
reap a habit, sow a habit, reap a character, sow a character,
reap a destiny"
Decisions are
the moment when something changes. The word come from the
Latin 'decaedere' caedere = to cut, de =
from; a true decision is to cut off from every other possibility.
I smoked for 9 years, and could relate easily to the man who
said "giving up smoking is simple, I do it every day".
But the point came when I decided, I put my foot down and
said "that's it" and meant it. I cut myself off
from all other possibilities, and I never smoked since. Tony
Robbins says 'when you make a real decision, you are drawing
a line, not in the sand, but in cement.'
The quality of
your life depends on the quality of the actions you take,
both physically & mentally. The quality of your actions
comes from the quality of your decisions, the quality of your
decisions depends on the meanings we give to our circumstances.
If you think that because you are here that you are a victim
& can never make good, that will give you a different
quality of decision. As a result of that belief you it will
also impact your actions & life to. If you think that
this is an opportunity to better yourself and learn from your
past, we will spend some time on that more next week.
That I think will
do as an illustration & foundation that change is near
to the heart of our unchanging God, I want to turn our attention
for the remaining 15 minutes to 2 'models' or illustrations
that we can build on in the coming sessions. What I want to
teach you is not 'rocket science' many of you will sit there
and say "Hey, I know that". But the key to success
is to become aware of what we do, slow it down, make it better
and then run it normally again, isn't that what a sports coach
does? He doesn't say anything new, but he slows Agassi down,
makes him see where he can make a small improvement, makes
him rehearse it slowly and then when he's got it right Wham!
Hes better than before. I want to show you what you
do in your head, that you don't even notice, but small changes
will make big differences.
Firstly the behavior model:
Have you ever
met someone who was rude & unhelpful to you? And you didn't
like their behavior? Do you think they are always like that?
What about when you do it to others? What makes the difference?
THE STATE that you are in, you could be in a happy state,
an angry or frustrated state, and they will give you access
to two very different sets of behavior won't they?
So the behaviors
we produce are the RESULT of the state that we are in. And
our state is determined by two major factors, firstly our
Physiology, by that I mean our body: have you ever noticed
that your state is different when you are feeling physically
tired or in pain or even with a cold? How about your state
of mind when you have been sitting on an uncomfortable chair
for too long? Ah, smiles - your body is telling me what is
happening to your state! Our state is affected by the condition
of our body. Whether it is weak, run down and in poor condition,
but also in the way we use our physiology. We will do some
exercises next session to reinforce this, but the way you
are all nodding & smiling, you can all recognize this
from your own experience, either that or my flies are undone
and you think its funny!
Another clue to
how powerful physiology is, is the fact that so many people
try to change it, isn't this what people do when they drink
alcohol, take drugs, smoke, eat too much, or more positively
exercise or get quality sleep? We can impact our state through
physiology by either changing our biochemistry artificially
or naturally. Even the way we walk and have muscle tension
in our bodies, the depth of breath we take and position we
hold our heads in changes the way we feel, try this exercise:
Capewalk; walk round the room slowly, looking down at the
ground, shoulders slumped, shallow breathing, now stop, shake
your body out, and I want you to stride round the room, head
up, breathing deep and strong, but this time I want you to
walk as if you had a silk Batman cape on, or your a vampire
and you have this long flowing cape .... Yeah, that's it ....
OK who noticed a difference? Did anyone not notice a difference?
... Can you check his pulse? Oh you did, what was it? Confident,
how come just walking made you confident, it couldn't be that
simple could it? Can you see how just becoming aware of these
things could have a major impact on how you spend the day
tomorrow, and you don't even have to have the cape dry cleaned!
OK the other element
that affects our state is internal representations, that's
just a fancy way of saying whatever you do in your head, the
pictures you see, the sounds that you hear, the things that
you say to yourself. We can break this down into 2 groupings
as well. First the content of what you do in your head, and
second how you do it in your head. Lets have an example:
Lets say that we have a desired state called 'sleep', obviously
you can affect this with your physiology. If you have just
drunk a pot of coffee your biochemistry is not going to allow
this, also if your body is in pain, uncomfortable or already
refreshed you will not sleep. But also what happens in your
head affects this, if you lie there and your content is an
upsetting argument you once had or something scary what will
happen? Yeah, your heart pounds, and you're wired! Thats
content, but the way we do these things in our head notices
too, how about if you run through all the things you haven't
done today real fast, loud and right up close in your face,
how does that feel? Whoa! Look at his face, can you see that
register? That brings me on to the next thing in just introducing
you to this behavioral model, and that is, the mind and the
body are linked in what is called a 'cybernetic loop' which
only means your body is affected by your mind - like we just
saw there. If you sit and think of things that upset you,
you can speed up your pulse, get tension all over, and even
give yourself an ulcer with practice! But also like with the
cape walk, you know that your body affects your mind. We will
use this model in more detail in the sessions coming up, but
I wanted to give you a week to get used to it, and also to
give you a chance to think of any questions / or examples
of your own.
OK lets backtrack
just a little and look at beliefs before I give you your assignment,
we have already noted in passing that our beliefs control
our behavior, let me show you this diagram:
potential >>>>>>>
actions
^
v
^
v
beliefs <<<<<<<
results
OK lets start
with a simple e.g., lets have a 400 meter race. Now your belief
or attitude to that could be positive or negative. Lets start
with negative; you say to yourself, I can't run, I never could
run well, I always lose races - that is your belief or attitude,
OK how much of your potential will you tap? Right, not a lot,
you do see the point in even trying right? We all look like
we are equally out of shape here, but what kinds of actions
will you take? Half-hearted, tentative, and so lets face it
your results are going to be pretty underwhelming. But the
your brain says "See! I told you I couldn't run!"
and it reinforces the whole thing, and so you can get some
people who hardly even try to run the race of life, and every
time they don't go for it, they get duff results, which reinforce
the beliefs that kept them stuck. Lets go at it the
other way. I say 'lets go run 400 m' you go "oh Yeah.
I was born to run, I got wings on my feet, and you will eat
my dust, lets go" now your potential may not be any different
to mine, but do you think you will tap more of it? right,
and so what kind of action will you take, and results?
Man: but what if he loses?
Thats the
beauty of this, what do you say? .... 'I'm good but he's better,
I need to train more cos I am a top class runner'. This model
is not some positive thinking recipe for success, there are
plenty of time when we don't win, but looking at it this way
means you can learn & grow stronger, and keep playing
the game of life.
(Comment that
potential for Christians & nonchristians is different)
Absolutely, Phil 4.13 says "I can do all things through
Christ who strengthens me" now obviously these are thing
that God is wanting us to do, but we have the indwelling Holy
Spirit, lets think of some egs: Man: what about Abraham, he
believed God, and God gave him the potential to father a child,
he had 'lead in his pencil' but still had to take action and
'write' his future.Good, and what about when you are filled
with the Holy Spirit and you know that it is Gods will for
you to share your faith with a fellow prisoner. So you take
action and whichever way the actual encounter goes it actually
strengthens your faith. And you often see Gods power bringing
much greater results than you could of dreamt of: the same
thing happens in prayer and all sorts (discussion about a
blind prisoner, and whether he would be / could be healed
if they prayed for him). OK lets work through this and see
what you think. Does God have the potential to heal him? Do
you believe that enough to take action? What would it mean
if he werent healed when you prayed?
Man: we'd need to learn about
prayer, no sin in our lives, and God doesn't have to first
time anyway.
OK, one thing
I can add to that, you can get a 100% guarantee that, you
will miss every shot you don't take. We can learn from our
results if we will treat them as feedback and adjust what
we are doing according to the new information they give us,
but if we don't try we don't know anything at all. (a question
about whether this was just positive thinking) Well, kind
of, but I think that it's about time Christians were more
positive. I mean, we do have a lot to be positive about -
we have a Father in heaven that loves us unconditionally.
We have eternal life and the power to live life abundantly
now. We know that all things work together for the good of
those who love God, and that God by very character is a redeemer
and will therefore use every experience we have to change
us into Christ's likeness. I think that the human potential
movement's main weakness is that the vast majority of humanity
is going to hell and no amount of positive thinking will change
that. Positive action by Gods people sharing the gospel will
though, but if we don't believe that and take action we will
have no results at all.
OK we are going
to rap up with a short exercise, that will get you thinking
& applying some of these things: think back 10 years ago,
where were you then? What were you like? Who were your friends?
What were your hopes, your dreams? OK, what were some seemingly
small decisions that have brought you to this point in your
life, right here, right now? Even if you only think of just
one for each year, did you know this is where you would end
up? Also, in 10 years time you will surely arrive, the important
question is, 'where?' How you are going to live life for the
next 10 years? Whats important to you now, and in the
long term? What actions or decisions can I take today that
will shape my ultimate destiny? "Life is either a daring
adventure or it is nothing" Helen Keller.
Good night.
Session 2: Using your brain
for a change
Hi there its good
to be back and especially to see so many of you here, lets
get straight to it, firstly lets just remind ourselves of
the Behavior model. Let me quickly explain it again:
physiology
& internal representations = state > behavior.
OK rather than
just keep talking about these things, lets really learn them,
lets experience them in our body. Physiology: lets
imagine I have #30,000 to give the first person who can describe
a man I have hiding behind the door. Not just any man but
describe a man with depression, shoulders, breathing, eyes,
tension, posture, voice tone etc., great. You can see that
every emotional state has a physiology that characterizes
it. Lets play at one end of the cybernetic loop shall we?
First I would like you to sit like you are completely energized
& excited, that's great, how are you breathing? Where
are your shoulders? Chest? Head & eyes? Notice how it
feels.
You weren't feeling
that state until I asked you to act as if, and now how many
of you can feel that state in your head & in your body?
All of you, terrific. Now lets have a little "bored &
tired" I know some of you will have to try quite hard
to remember what this is like .... NOT! OK we can see major
shifts in position & breathing & muscle tension, describe
how your body is ...... right? It is very much like our depressed
friend who is still outside, Tony Robbins suggests that the
reason that many people get depressed is just because they
are bored & tired!
Your body leads
your emotions, i.e. go for a skip down the corridor &
see how that changes your state, explode into Beethoven's
9th. Compare the way people use drugs / drink to
change their state. Whether that is biochemical or doing some
great exercise or even speeding up your movements and have
more certainty in the quality of the way you use your body.
Biblical egs, psalms, clap your hands, raise your hands, lift
your eyes, bow down, prostrate, & dance see Psalm 95.1-7,
121.1, 149.1-5 and Psalm 47
Internal representations:
I want you close
your eyes and take a deep breath, relax in your seats and
take another deep breath and this time I want you to imagine
you have nostrils in the soles of your feet and are sucking
in oxygen up to your waist, great. Now I want you to make
a picture in your mind of a sunny beach, if you hate the beach
then go to a nice fresh meadow, see the blue sky, hear the
soft breeze in your ears and feel the softness under your
feet, now describe your state.... Next I want you to go to
that beach but it is grey and raining, it must be Skegness!
There is a flash of lightening and a distant roll of thunder,
describe your state ..... Finally, I want you to make a picture
of the sunny beach. Can you see it? And now hear the thunder,
what does that do? How many of you felt shifts in your body
as a result of what was happening in your heads? Well I think
youre all weird! No, really, isn't it incredible that
all of us are affected by our internal representations?
Lets divide it up and see the
impact of what we do in our heads & how we do it.
Focus: video analogy at party,
angry, loving, fun, wild!
The Bible talks a lot about
focus:
2 cor 3.18 / Heb 12.1-2, Psalm
34.1-6
- slight digression Acts 4.13,
been with Jesus, discipleship = molding & modeling beliefs
& values.
- a major decision you make
in your life is what you decide to focus on: questions, why
me Lord?, or how can I use this? Questions will determine
the meaning you give to a situation therefore the way you
will respond.
Question, what
does anything mean? Often we judge a situation rather than
perceiving and waiting: also we must realize that we have
a handbook to reality, eternal reality & therefore our
interpretation of events must take us closer to truth rather
than further away, e.g.: Footsteps late at night - alien,
intruder, loved one. What are the feelings you get from each
of these? Change the context & the response is different.
Learn to ask, "What else
could this mean?" also "How will this seem in a
months time" will you look back & laugh then? Why
wait!
- Chatterbox son - intelligent,
has plenty to say for himself.
- Angry boss - the work I do
is important to him.
- Huge tax bill - I'm earning
more.
"Even a headache is good
news to an aspirin salesman!
How: we focus
Roller coaster
dissociated / associated back to video metaphor.
Remember an argument,
who with, and the gist of what it was about, get back part
of the feelings, put it on the screen, with you in the picture,
so you are watching yourself having the argument over there.
Now turn the brightness down, turn the sound off & put
circus music, make it black & white, then push the telly
rightover there (my right - into past) how does that affect
the feelings? Now remember a particularly pleasant memory,
your choice, have it on the screen, add richness to the colors,
the sounds, bring it right up close & then step into the
memory so you are now seeing it through your own eyes, any
changes?
We often use our
words to describe literally what we do inside our heads, with
our memories & things that are happening even now, e.g.
I need to step back for awhile. I need some space. The situation
looks bleak / dark, she has a bright future. I need to put
some distance between it & me. Put the past behind you.
Its in my face. He has a colorful past, etc., also with
our bodies, just with stress - a pain in the neck, fed up,
sick of it, etc.
Read Psalms this
week to see how King David describes his experience in very
clear terms. You now have the basic understandings you need
to change your state & therefore your behaviors, to be
more consistent with who you are as a Christian, & also
to be more in control of how you respond to your environment.
Lets play awhile:
Scramble: first
I want you to find an unpleasant memory, one that still has
the power to make you feel bad, OK you all got one? If you
haven't, borrow someone else's! It looks like he's got enough
to go round! OK so you have a memory or maybe an every day
difficulty or embarrassment, now run that movie in your head
full sights & sounds, that's it, and notice how it feels.
Now what I want you to do is choose some wild theme music
or maybe circus music you know, or like the loony tunes theme,
now go back and run that unpleasant movie with the music going,
good, now check that memory - Hey you, what are you smiling
for? How many of you noticed a difference? But you still have
the necessary information, so you can learn from the past,
you just don't feel bad about it, good. OK lets try another
one, get another yuck memory, and run the movie through to
the end and freeze frame it, now step into the movie if you
were outside it, and I'm going to ask you to run it backwards
real fast, in full color, taking about 1.5 seconds, like on
a home movie but super fast right to the beginning , then
stop ready, steady, go! Do it 2 more times, let's test it,
think of that memory, how does it feel?.... Completely, different?
Great!
Just a word here,
as Christians we are not in the business of denial. God has
said He will teach us from every experience. That we can grow
in the light of our sins & mistakes, and that He will
even redeem them, that is, turn them around for our ultimate
good. Any change that we make cannot & must not violate
truth. What we are doing here is not changing the information
of the memories, but just stopping them holding us back from
growth in the future: all change must be towards conformity
with the Word of God, anything else is a sham and will not
last memory management, association / disassociation.
I would like you
to take an unpleasant memory and then watch it happening to
you over there, you are watching it happen on a screen. You
are not seeing it happen through your own eyes, but it is
like someone else took a video of it happening and is showing
it to you. This is called disassociation, and it is one of
the things the human brain does naturally with unpleasant
experiences. Like just before death your life flashing before
your eyes, or in an accident, you feel strangely remote and
disengaged, especially if there is significant pain. And don't
we sometimes say that when someone is really distraught that
they are 'besides themselves?' Our language tells us a lot
doesn't it? But the same can work for our pleasant memories.
Have you ever seen someone relive a memory? Like they are
fully there? Do it now, pleasant memory, get it back, step
inside, do you recover those feelings? OK so we can use this
to dissociate from painful memories, but still keep our learnings,
and associate into pleasant memories so we have a rich treasury
of good times. NB: this helps you to deal with problems, have
you ever noticed that someone else's problems are "No
big deal" and are easy to solve? You can do this with
your own without being confused by your own feelings.
Session 3: .....and keep
the change
Good evening.
We are going to learn more this evening than you could hope
for. And the wonderful thing is, is that you don't need to
try to remember it at all. What I mean by that is, everything
that happens to you is recorded fully on the hard disk of
your brain. (Obviously not everything that happens around
you, because there are the constraints of your physical abilities,
like whether you have good or poor eyesight & hearing,
and also the fact that you have to ignore the majority of
things going on or you would just BOOOM! overload!) But have
you ever noticed that you hear or see something and then that's
it, its lost? But maybe years later someone mentions it, and
as they give a little detail it all comes rushing back? So
you didn't forget it, you just hadn't recalled it, but given
the time when you needed that information again you were able
to get it back again.
OK so what? Well
is it possible that what Jesus said when he promised the disciples
that the Holy Spirit would bring them remembrance of what
he had taught them. It did not mean that they would have to
keep trying to remember what he had said, but that the Holy
Spirit would supernaturally bring that accurate and undistorted
recall to them so that the gospels we have are true and reliable.
In a much less significant way, we are going to learn and
experience some new things that you don't need to try and
remember because you will find that they become available
as and when you need them. I will say a little more about
learning in a moment, but lets get an experience of one of
the things we talked about last week in terms of the sensations
that questions you ask affecting your body and state.
Exercise:
What I want you
to do is think of something that is a mild problem for you
in your life right now, get a clear representation of what
it is, and ask yourself these questions about it:
- Whats wrong?
- Why do I have this problem?
- How long have I had it?
- How does this limit or restrict
me?
- What does this problem stop
me from doing that I want to do?
- Whose fault is it that I
have this problem?
- When was the worst time I
experienced this problem?
Now I'd like you to take a
deep breath, shake out your body and think of a descriptive
word for what it felt like answering these questions.....
OK not good.
Now with the same challenge
answer these questions:
- What do I want?
- When do I want it?
- How will I know that I have
it?
- When I get what I want, what
else in my life will improve?
- What resources do I have
available to help me?
- How can I best utilize the
resources that I have?
- What can I begin doing now
to help me get what I want?
Now take a deep breath, shake
out your body and think of a descriptive word.
Who noticed any
difference? Ok nearly all of you. But you were thinking of
the same problem in each case, so you can see how something
as simple and basic as our questions can affect our state:
any feedback? (Discussion on how the 'blame frame' focused
on mans fault and weakness, and the outcome frame focused
on God as the ultimate 'resource' and also gave security as
He had always been the answer in other problems in the past,
and could be relied on for the future. Also discussed the
issue of God's will in answering prayer, how we need to be
specific in our requests and full of faith, but humble and
flexible in our attitude because God's solution is always
the best, and we might not be able to see it yet.)
Right, how many
of you have had your telephone number changed? Can you remember
it? Can you remember your old one? its a little harder but
you can can't you, so how do you do that? Its amazing to think
that when you ask your brain for your phone number it gives
you the right one. That's because your brain usually codes
more recent learning with a higher coding than old information.
I say usually, because exceptions are along the lines of when
we learn something in an intensely emotional state, say something
irrational. It is quite hard to just "talk someone out
of it" with new accurate information because that state
interferes, so we have another way of doing that.
But just think
if your brain didn't keep updating what you have learned in
this way, you wouldn't believe you could jump a 3 foot puddle,
because there was a time when you were 18 months old when
you couldn't! OK so new learning is a sign of growth, of being
alive. And so in one sense we can see all change as new learning,
we used to respond in one way, then we learned a new phone
number and now we respond another way. The 'old number' is
not erased, because when you try you can recall it, so you
have the choice of dialing it if you want, but your brain
says "why bother, I don't live there anymore" so
your brain has found a new route to 'phone home'.
All change is
learning and we learn quick and easy, how about if we had
a conversation one word a day, or we saw a movie one frame
a week, it wouldn't make sense, our brains process information
very fast, and that is how we learn and therefore change.
One other thing
about learning is the way we do it: we learn by taking something
from outside our experience and linking it up with something
we do know. Like if I told you about the kind of variable
resistors or something like that on my guitar, you would look
at me blankly like you are now. But if I said its like a small
water tap that lets electricity and sound through then you
have a metaphor. You have something that you can link it to.
And the best teachers are those that take something unknown
and say "its like" something that is known. What
about Jesus, the kingdom of God is like a mustard seed, a
lost coin, yeast in dough, a wedding feast, and you go back
to your rooms and reread Revelation, it is full of this language,
"I saw, as it were, a sea of glass, or the living creatures
were like....." etc. John was lost for words so he said,
look it wasn't made of glass, but it was like that.
Of course there
are times in our lives, when we are very young, and when we
are learning something completely new. When there is nothing
on the inside that we know that can be used as a 'likeness'
for what is unknown on the outside, and the result is confusion,
how many of you know confusion? Thats brilliant. Because
confusion is a message that says you are about to learn something
completely new that will open up new horizons of learning
for you, that you are not trying to fit the real world to
your experience. What you do know, but are allowing reality
to affect you directly and you will learn from that? And again,
when you see what happens to writers like Ezekiel, you know
that if they tried to reduce the revelation of Gods glory
to what they had known in the past, the Bible would not have
such an awe-inspiring view of God.
OK so lets experience something
new and then we will learn from it.
Sit right forward
and get feelings in your body of total excitement and energy,
feeling really good! Ok now double it, breathe the way you
would breath if you were totally energized, excited and unstoppable.
Now in that state, click your fingers and say "yes"
in an unstoppable tone of voice, and again, and again, twice
more, increase that feeling. OK now sit back and tell me what
you guys get for breakfast here ....... Now click your fingers
in exactly the same way and say 'yes' the way you did, what
happens? Look around - isn't that a nice feeling to go from
thinking about prison breakfasts to feeling so alive? What
can we learn from this? Well we learn by linking things up
in our experience, we make associations, or even Neuro-associations
in our brain and body between this and this, and normally
this happens completely randomly, like have you ever smelt
a perfume that reminded you of a time with your Granny? Or
freshly baked bread takes you back doesn't it? The same goes
for faces, someone walks into the room and it completely affects
your state, you might get really mad, frightened, or overwhelmed
with joy .... Yeah, just like when you see your children ....
How about when you are in a really intense state like love,
and the song that they keep playing on the radio is linked
to that, it becomes 'our song' but years later you hear that
and it takes you right back there?
These things are
environmental triggers for those states, and can happen really
randomly. Also advertisers know how this works, so they try
to elicit an emotional response from you by showing you images
and sounds, and then they flash their product before you and
eventually by repetition they will link the two together.
Now isn't it nice to know how to be in control of that process?
Are there any times in your life when it might be useful to
feel full of energy and unstoppable?... at your parole panel!
Ok its better than going in all stressed and maybe saying
something that blows your chances.
Let me give you
4 keys to creating effective links or what are called 'anchors'.
First put yourself in a fully associated (really there), full
body experience, as intense as possible. Next make the link
or trigger at the peak of the experience, third make it a
unique trigger, like something you say to yourself or a posture
etc. And finally, to get the state back you need to replicate
the trigger precisely, i.e. same place on your body, tone
of voice, posture, etc.
Right before we
do our final exercise, I want to mention that there are 2
basic kinds of change, there is 'remedial' i.e. applying a
remedy. So youre 'broken', you come to me and I fix
you, now if that was a physical thing like a broken bone then
you could go and break it again and so we could have a long
and unproductive relationship. The second kind is called 'generative'
because it is something that sets you up for the future in
a new way. It functions more like flicking over the first
domino and then all the others go over, or the ripples on
a pond after you have dropped just one pebble in it. So if
I could teach you to have strong leg muscles, to be careful
with yourself and to avoid environments where legs get broken
etc. If I could teach you where even if you encountered the
situation you would be greater than the leg breaking force
and would overcome it and not need fixing. Generative is more
a direction than a cure, instead of asking 'what's wrong,
how can I fix it?' generative change asks, 'what's great,
how can I make it better still?'
An interesting
thing is that often in the process of remedial change we learn
things that are useful for the future and we use the generatively.
I.E., when we did the backward movie and association / dissociation
they were primarily remedial, dealing with your past, but
you learned that you could take control of what you do inside
your head & that learning sets you in a new direction.
This all sounds
very highbrow stuff, but we can look at scripture and see
that God does both kinds of change. In salvation, we are broken,
sinful, hellbound and separated from him. Through Jesus he
rescues us, forgives us, and 'fixes' us. Then in the generative
sense, He makes us His children, and adopts us, and sets us
the new direction of maturing in our sonship so we become
more like Jesus. At this point I hope you will see that we
have gone full circle from session 1. We are truly children
of God, and all change is to be in the direction of Christlikeness.
Whether that is in being saved, or in developing in the fruit
of the Spirit in Galatians 5.22-23.
Now lets consider
how we can use what we have learned about associations in
the light of growing as Christians. One way to tackle the
future is to take a 'resource' and 'future pace' it, i.e.
know what's coming up. To know what you have had as a resource
in the past and link them up in advance. For example, if you
created an anchor of: knowing God's presence and faithfulness,
confidence, joy, gratitude and energy & vitality, and
thought ahead of a panel coming up, or something else that
caused anxiety will triggering that feeling, then you have
linked the two in advance. Paul actually demonstrates how
he has hope for the future, even in coming troubles, because
his hope is built on past experiences of Gods faithfulness
and power, you can read this in Rom 5.1-5.
That is one way,
and I have rushed through it a bit, so you will need to experiment
a bit, but the other that I want us to do is the 'swish'.
In the swish finding a cue image or situation
that would lead you off into thinking or behavior that you
don't want, and changing the association so it takes you in
a direction you do want. So first of all think of a situation
that fits this description........ Get a cue image, bring
it up big and bright, now put that to one side for a moment.
Make a big bright
image of the kind of person you want to be. Now lets digress
a little. I would like you to make a composite image. And
lets work on it together for a while. Make an image
of what you think a child of God looks like, not outwardly,
but in terms of character, speech, reactions, the way you
would walk, the way that you resemble Jesus in your manner
with others (a brainstorming session describing an attractive
Christian life). Now I would like you to find a way of representing
that in your image of yourself. Maybe the way you are standing,
or a sparkle in your eyes, a calmness and trust in your bearing
as you look at this image of what you want to become as you
grow and change as a Christian. Remember you will be able
to update this as you learn more about being like Jesus, notice
how this makes you feel, it is compelling, it draws you to
it, it pulls you in a new direction.
Ok, so do you
think it would be useful to be able to link the cue image
that used to take you off into sinful, or unhelpful behavior
and thinking, to link this image with a new one that pulled
you towards a happy holiness and a calm trust in God? That
every time you encountered this problem it would remind you
that you are a new creation and the old things have passed
away? And even your problems would become a stimulus to propel
you in the right direction rather than causing you to stumble?
OK so one way to link them
is an exercise called the swish pattern:
1) Bring up the cue image
2) Place the desired image
in the corner, small and dark, and then make the desired image
grow in size and brightness, coming closer and breakthrough
the 1st picture, 3) as it grows make the sound 'whoooosh!'
When it breaks through feel the feelings associated with looking
at that compelling image of how you want to be and respond.
Essentially what you are doing
is through repetition and emotional intensity you are telling
your brain "see this (image 1) - do this (image 2)"
Ok now do this fast 10 times............
Now think of the cue image,
what happens? Aha! A new learning!
Now, one last
word. These things are helpful and enjoyable and really do
set you off in a new direction, one that leads towards God,
and away from self-reliance. I want you to know without a
shadow of a doubt that the most important thing that you must
do on a daily, consistent basis, is to walk in close fellowship
with God. We have talked before about spiritual breathing:
to be confessing our sins and receiving forgiveness on the
basis of 1 Jn 1.9, "if we confess our sins, He is faithful
and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness".
No amount of swishing will take the place of this. "If
we say we have no sin we deceive ourselves and the truth is
not in us". And the other important part is to be filled
with the Holy Spirit, and walk in obedience to Him. If we
do this we will abide in the vine and the life of the vine
with flow through us and we will grow strong and bare fruit.
May God bless us as we do first things first and run after
the prize of knowing Christ, and being like Him.
(c)1998
Ian Field.
All rights reserved.
www.neurosemantics.com
|